🐾 How to teach your dog to be home alone: a guide to a calm four-legged friend!
You put on your coat, grab your keys, and head for the door. Behind you, you hear your dog's soft whimper—or worse: barking, panic, or broken belongings as soon as you return. Being home alone is a challenge for many dogs. And let's be honest: it can be quite stressful for you as an owner, too.
But good news: with patience, structure, and the right approach, you can teach your dog to feel safe and relaxed when you're out for a bit. This blog post will give you step-by-step instructions on how to do this.
🧠 Why do dogs find it hard to be alone?
Dogs are naturally pack animals . They're used to being together, whether with other dogs or—in the case of domestic dogs—with people. Being alone feels unnatural, exciting, or even scary for some dogs. This can lead to:
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Whining, barking or crying
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Peeing or pooping in the house
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Demolition of furniture or belongings
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Restless behavior or pacing in circles
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Excessive licking or panting
This behavior is often referred to as separation anxiety . Fortunately, you can train your dog to cope better with it.
🔄 The key: build up in small steps
As with other forms of training, it's important to proceed gradually . Suddenly leaving your dog alone for hours is asking for trouble. It's all about gradual adjustment .
Step 1: Start with being absent from the same room
Get your dog used to the idea of you not being right next to them all the time. For example, go sit in another room and close the door. Gradually build this up from a few seconds to a few minutes.
Step 2: Pretend you're leaving (but don't actually go)
Put on your coat, grab your keys, put on your shoes—but just stay home. This way, your dog learns that these signals don't always mean you'll be gone long. This helps reduce the tension surrounding your departure .
Step 3: Short absence, actual departure
Leave the house briefly. Start with 30 seconds and gradually build up to a few minutes, then 10, then 20, and so on. Remember: only return when your dog is calm . Otherwise, they'll learn that barking or whining will "bring you back."
🐶 Important: don't make a fuss about it
How you behave before and after leaving affects how your dog feels. Try:
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Make leaving and returning as neutral as possible . No elaborate farewells, no exuberant greetings.
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Not being comforted when your dog is restless can unintentionally reinforce the behavior.
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Providing peace and predictability : a fixed routine provides security.
🧸 Use aids and distractions
While you're away, you can make it more pleasant for your dog by distracting him with something positive:
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Chew toys such as a stuffed Kong (with peanut butter, yogurt, or meat, for example)
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Food puzzles or sniffing mats
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Soft background sounds such as soothing music or the radio
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A worn piece of clothing of yours , so that your scent stays close by
Note: Only give these items when you're away. This way, they'll create a positive association with being alone.
📅 Create a training schedule
Just as you make time for walking or working out, you can also schedule time for "training alone." For example:
| Day | Goal | Last only |
|---|---|---|
| Monday | Start training | 1 minute |
| Tuesday | Repetition | 3 minutes |
| Wednesday | Rest day | |
| Thursday | New stimulus (putting on a coat) + 5 min | |
| Friday | Real short absence | 10 minutes |
| Weekend | Evaluation and building | 15-20 minutes |
Pay attention to your dog: is he doing well? Go a little further. Is he struggling? Take a step back.
🚩 Recognizing signs of stress
During training, it's important to observe how your dog is feeling. Look for these signs of tension :
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Panting or drooling without physical exertion
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Restless walking or squeaking
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Yawning (stress gap)
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Ears back, tail low
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Not eating treats you left behind
Are you seeing a lot of these signs? Then you're probably going too fast. Build up more slowly.
🧑⚕️ When is help needed?
Some dogs suffer so much from separation anxiety that you can't manage it yourself. In that case, it's wise to seek help from:
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Behavioral expert or dog trainer with experience in separation issues
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Veterinarian , if you suspect medical or hormonal causes
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Dog therapist , for tailor-made guidance
There are also dogs that require temporary medication to enable training — this is always done in consultation with a veterinarian and in combination with behavioral training.
💡 Extra tips for success
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Provide sufficient mental and physical stimulation during the day. A well-rested and challenged dog is calmer when left alone.
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Avoid overstimulation. Too much stimulation right before you leave (such as rough play) can hinder your peace of mind.
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Try varying the departure time. Don't always leave your dog alone at the same time, so he gets used to variety.
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Consider using a camera. This way, you can see how your dog behaves while you're away. This will help you fine-tune the training.
🏁 Finally, stay patient
Learning to be alone for dogs can be a process similar to learning to ride a bike for children. It takes time, trust, and repetition. You might fall over a few times along the way (literally or figuratively), but in the end, it'll all work out—if you take your time.
Be kind to your dog, but also to yourself. Every success, no matter how small, is something to be proud of.
Because in the end, it's nice for both of you: you can leave the house with peace of mind, and your dog can wait relaxed at home until you return . 🐕